Broken Together

Ahh, it feels good to write again. This summer was a time to be quiet, patient, and still...three things that if you know me in the slightest, you know are not words used to describe me. Heath and I have had an incredible season in our marriage that I now feel wondrously thankful to have experienced with someone. I couldn't blog through it, and I won't be writing about it today either. Maybe someday.

We had that make-or-break point in our marriage where so many give up and walk away from each other. Every day was pain. Every day was a choice to be quiet, patient, and still. It was so hard.

To see God's hand work in our marriage was something I was not prepared to experience to the degree that we did. He separated us for a time, worked on each of us, and then put us back

BROKENTogether.

 

 

I'm thankful to be able to pick right back up where I left off- writing about my beautiful family, and sharing pictures of the boys. I've got a lot of Luke posts to catch up on! :)

Love,
Catherine

BellaBaby: Luke's Newborn Pictures

Welcome to the world, Lucas Grey McEver!

Born February 24, 2015, weighing in at 9 lbs 4 oz and 20 1/2 inches long. We love our fat, little Luke!

Delivery post to come with pictures, but here's how to view the hospital pictures they took yesterday:

Go to bellababyphotography.com
Enter access code: ES0226MJNEWS

Enjoy!!!

4 More Days....!!!

What.....??? How did we get here already?!?!

Baby boy will make his debut Tuesday morning, the 24th, unless he comes earlier on his own. My last Ob apt was this past Wednesday and my pre-op at the hospital is Monday morning. It feels C.R.A.Z.Y.

I can tell I've been waaaay more hormonal these past few weeks. I get angry, I get sad, I laugh, I cry, I sleep awesome, I'm up all night, just way all over the board. 90% of the time I sleep great which I'm SO, SO, SO thankful for as it helps me feel like I can take on anything as long as I've slept decent. Maybe 1 night out of the week I wake around 3/4am with super energy and just clean/organize/bake/cook, whatever. Heath loves those nights b/c he wakes up to me smiling and handing him coffee at 6am, with his breakfast made and snacks for the day ready to go. I've also learned the art of napping- if I sleep 20-30 minutes it won't affect my sleep that night. Any longer and I've just blown my night. I'm the queen of a catnap now! Obviously there's no way to "stock up" on sleep, but man it's way easier to carry Luke than it was Easton, who kept me up all night. Sometimes I'll feel so good that I'll go to do a normal activity and then be like, oh crap, I'm hugely pregnant and can't do this.

I do hate my indecisiveness with food at this point. Nothing sounds good, I don't really want to eat but am hungry, and then become grouchy. Even when I can find something appealing I can't eat much and it's annoying so I'd rather not eat. I got a little touchy on the subject of pizza with Heath and told him to just STOP talking about it. It's too filling and makes me want to vom, so please never say that word again. I'll plan our menu for the week, prepare our dinner and after smelling it cook I'll give it to a neighbor. I'll sit down with a plate another night and stare at it before giving up. I'll really feel like I know what I want to eat and then think about it and change my mind. I'll walk into a coffee shop and almost cry because I really can't decide if I want French vanilla or hazelnut, and no matter what I choose it'll be wrong. Like- really, really annoy myself at this point and I formally apologize to my family. 4 days guys and then *hopefully* I'll be nursing and starving so food will be a better experience for the family.

I don't think I have a picture of me this week? Odd for me but I feel like I post a ton anyways. I'll be sure to take my LAST one Monday at my pre-op! :)

Look at some of these sweet outfits:

This Easter onesie is something I bought for Cory, & Easton wore it too. Now it'll be passed on to Luke.

Everything for baby is DONE. I refuse to add anything else to my list at this point! I'm a little stressed about how April is going to go with a 5-week old...we have way too many activities in that month: Cory's 10th bday, Easter (which is CRAZY early this year), Dawson's 1st bday, Zachary's bday, Easton's bday, Spring Break, & Pre-K registration for Easton. Sigh.

I have learned from past experiences to ask for help when needed and I'm super thankful for those that have allowed me to specifically ask for help with our boys. We've asked church friends to help get our boys to church those first few weeks & set up some Saturday play dates so they can get out and be loud & energetic & normal while I'm not. I'm hoping they'll still know we love them while we're sleep deprived! I'm a little nervous about the transition but excited too! This boy is feeling bigger and bigger and I'm so ready to see what he looks like! I wish I could just peek in my belly. What color eyes do you have little one? Will you have crazy hair like Easton or be bald like Cory? Will you weigh more than your brothers or be my smallest one? Will you have iced coffee withdrawals? Will you be excited to see us too???

I'd like to end with the same prayer requests I mentioned early on in the pregnancy. In a nutshell (bc I don't want to dwell on it these last few days): I hemorrhaged with Easton due to his large size & a uterus that wouldn't contract, had some blood transfusions and left the hospital with hemoglobin levels around a 5. This baby is predicted to be a similar size and I'm hoping the delivery is not similar to the last one. My uterus needs to contract!

Here's the link so those of you familiar with it don't have to reread it on today's post: http://themcevers.blogspot.com/2014/08/12-weeks.html.

We dearly, dearly love all the friends that might want to visit while we're in the hospital, but are asking that just family come since we just don't know what to expect. I don't know if I'll have a hysterectomy, I'm hoping I don't hemorrhage again, the Pitocin given after delivery has the potential to make me sick, & I've been promised "uterine massages" for a full 24 hours. We love you guys, but are asking for some time. We're praying everything goes well, but please wait to hear that we are ready for hospital visitors. I am so excited to show off and share Luke with everyone, I hope all friends know that & understand! We love you, thanks for all of your prayers!!! They are very much appreciated!!!!

 

Baby Nursery

We had our 36 week appointment today, and it sounds repetitive at this point, but everything is going great! They did the last ultrasound we'll have until he's born and I am so IN LOVE with this baby already! He looks so squished in there, but I'm sure he's comfy. :) The cord wasn't anywhere near his neck (I asked), he was head down (so he's turned some time..??), and is still in the top 98% with that weight- maybe we'll call him Linebacker Lucas? He weighs in right under 8 lbs, which is actually a relief to me! He's been consistent about gaining 1/2 lb a week, and with 3 weeks left that gives me a 9 lb'er- MUCH better than the 10 lb's I was dreading a month ago!!! I'm thrilled with my weight gain too- and technically, I can subtract 9 lbs. right...?! I know these last few weeks will be hard, but I am truly enjoying this pregnancy more, knowing it's our last one. Only 3 more weeks of being able to feel a baby kick inside my belly, I'm loving his sweet movements, and still in awe that God creates miracles. He's SO-MUCH-MORE-STILL than Easton ever was, I'm actually able to sleep decently at night. Easton never stopped and that boy would not let me sleep, and I think that's why I was so miserable with him at the end. Luke just curls up to one side of my stomach at night and I pretty much don't feel him while I sleep, or he'll move for a few minutes and then settle back down. Maybe I'll have a good sleeper? Who knows! Three weeks seems an eternity away today, I'm so ready to hold this boy!

I got my hair highlighted this week and my hairdresser insisted on taking this side profile of my belly. Here's 3 weeks left to go:

Finally, finally got the nursery in order too. Huge difference in timeline between Baby #1 and #3, but hey- it's done, and it's beautiful. Heath did a super, super fantastic job on making such sweet little pieces for his room, and saving us money in the process. I love knowing Daddy not only set everything up, but put time & love into the small things too, it's so sweet.

The crib furniture was Easton's and I really, really tried to not make everything too "baby" so I wouldn't be changing everything in a year. I wanted it to transition easily from baby to little boy, and not have murals on the wall this time, just things on shelves I could change out if I wanted to. I learned my lesson with bedding too- we stay away from themes for the same reason. Cory has plaid, Easton has a rugby stripe and since it's not a trendy character print I'll spend more on bedding hoping it'll last through the years for them!

Here's our nautical-themed nursery:

Heath made and painted the shelf! Isn't it great?!

Again, a Heath creation he made out of a piece of wood. Painted by Daddy too.

We needed a ledge for the monitor to sit on so we could see both boys, and yet have no one reach it! Ta-da! Thanks honey.

This will change many times I'm sure, and is nowhere near half of all the clothes these boys own.

LOVE this super soft tummy-time pillow from Jennifer & Addison!



Changing table with another lime green touch. :)

I love it! Heath did a fantastic job!!! Now all it needs is a sleeping baby!!!

I can't remember if I bragged on his work in Cory's football room either? We did that last year but it still looks fantastic, and Cory loves it.

We're blessed!

Breastfeeding Class

Yes, this is our 3rd baby and I'm still taking breastfeeding classes, not only because I think it's always important to keep learning, but mainly because Heath and I had the WORST experience with Easton's birth, and breastfeeding encompassed a huge portion of our issues. All we had been told was how natural nursing was, it should be relatively pain-free, God made our bodies to provide for our babies, and to stick with it because the payoff was worth it. That was not the experience we had, it was almost the complete opposite, and I took it very personally when my body would not could not produce enough to support Easton's growth. With Easton it got to the point where I'd feel nauseous & dread every three hours because I knew he'd need to eat soon. Thrown in some mastitis and thrush fun, and I q.u.i.t.

With this negative attitude towards breastfeeding I still can't deny the benefits, so I signed us up for a class at St. Mary's and wrote down allllllll my questions, issues & problems we had last time. I needed answers and mainly encouragement before Baby Luke gets here. I knew I had a serious issue I needed to discuss with someone when we were watching a video of a woman breastfeeding last night, and I was feeling that same nauseous feeling, & scanned the room for a trash can.

The class was the typical breastfeeding class I expected: the benefits of nursing, the different positions to nurse, how to get baby to latch, troubleshooting issues, etc. Everything was going smoothly until the RN brought up nursing bra's. Her advice to the class was to wait until after the baby was born (bc you won't know the size you need until your milk comes in), and simply drive to the mall and purchase some. Um, what? Nobody else seemed to really think this was crazy and Heath just hung his head bc he knew I wasn't going to stay quiet. (I just started the "Keep it Shut" Bible study too). So I politely interrupted, "Excuse me? Um, that's not going to work....for anyone. Who has a baby and pops into the mall a week later to shop and try on bra's with a newborn, and your milk leaking everywhere? Especially knowing I'm having a C-section and won't be cleared to drive for 6 weeks? That's not something I can send my husband out to get either. What do you really do?" It got quiet, and then instead of some granola answer from the teacher, it got real. I LOVED her for her honesty and she stayed after class with me for over 40 minutes going over my list of questions. She was SO, SO helpful and gave me answers NO ONE has ever told me in a book, or in a doctor's office. Her answers weren't the typical PC answers and not only am I writing them here to remember them, but to share with others. Our last class is this Wed (tomorrow) so if you're reading this and think of another question, write me! I want to ask bc I want to know.

Q: Above (the nursing bra one).

A: Typically, you go up a cup size. So if you're a 36C, you could buy a 36D. Except everyone's body is different and you really don't know how your breasts will change. So buy some maternity cami's with the built in bra's, and go to Walmart.com for $11 nursing bra's that you can "guess" with before baby. Spending $40 on 2 nursing cami's and 2 nursing bra's will be enough to get you through those first few weeks. Then after the nursing routine is established, & if you're able to nurse, go invest in some quality nursing bra's bc they are made to hold up through a lot.

Q: My colostrum wasn't enough to satisfy my baby until my milk came in. Like, not at all. I had the most angry bird-baby who screamed on my breast every 3 hours while being told this was "normal."

A: (After asking me his birth weight, delivery method and some other questions) You're right, colostrum is protein-rich and satisfying for small-to-typical weight babies but for bigger babies it's often not enough. A vaginal birth signals hormones to get started on milk-making and it can take 2-3 days for your milk to come in, but with C-section deliveries it can often be delayed a day or two longer. Those two days make a huge difference to bigger babies. They're not as sleepy as smaller babies and want to eat. Also, if baby is crying, you've already missed the hunger cues and that's a very stressful time for Mom & baby to attempt a feeding with milk that hasn't come in. Be prepared to nurse & supplement until your milk comes in and know that that is okay. Your milk supply will catch up, but if your baby is displaying the "I'm starving" cues, dropping weight (not the typical ounces that are expected- Easton lost over 20% of body weight) & your milk is nowhere around, feed him/her!

Q: Can I pump before delivery? (Disclaimer: I did ask my Ob this and she said NO. Always, always ask your doctor. I'm not going with my doctor's advice on this one, but I'm 100% aware of it and that's still the decision I'm making.)

A: Yes, you can start around 10 days before delivery. Start pumping to send that "demand" message to your body. Don't pump around the clock, or set your alarm for the middle of the night, but start with 3x/day, around the same time everyday. Relax, watch tv, know you won't get anything right away. That's okay, bc you're just sending the "demand" signal. This can significantly cut down a 5-7 day wait time after a C-section delivery. Save whatever you get! Store that colostrum in a rubber-top syringe in the fridge and bring it with you to the hospital to give baby. Big babies tend to drop their blood sugar and when those nurses ask if they can give your baby a bottle, give them what you've already pumped.

Q: Won't that send me into early labor?

A: Not necessarily. Everyone's body is different and while it might give you contractions, there is not enough evidence from studies to fully support that it will kick start your labor. That's also why I'm recommending 10 days before due date.

Q: So breastfeeding is not natural and easy?

A: It is, and I loved it and still miss it. (Asked more questions about delivery complications). I 100% believe that your supply was down bc of the delivery trauma, which should not happen again with your doctors being more prepared for hemorrhaging. Your body was in survival mode and trying to keep you alive- making milk was not it's priority. I fully believe you are capable of nursing a baby and now you'll know the signs of when your baby is not getting enough. Be prepared to supplement if needed and your body should adjust to baby's demand in 10-14 days. Being diligent is key and put that baby on the breast every 3 hours. Give it 2 weeks to even out and you'll know if breastfeeding is for you, but don't quit before those 2 weeks. It gets easier and eventually you won't even have to think about it, you and baby will both be pro's.

Q: I felt so alone last time, like I had no help.

A: PLUG IN & be intentional. A Mommy/baby breastfeeding class if offered every Monday from 1-3 at St. Mary's with a lactation consultant present. Make it a priority to have someone drive you there those first few weeks. When people ask what they can do for you? Ask for help with transportation there. We can't help you much over the phone, get a family member/friend/husband to bring you here. It's a free service. If you're experiencing problems and it's a Friday, call us and we'll schedule you to come in same-day, that's free as well. Prepare a friend or two in advance that you'll be needing help & ask them to be prepared to come to your house to help you. The key is to prepare now for help- before baby, before issues arise.

I also had some more technical questions about my breast pump and she said Wednesday was the day we'd be going over pumps, how to use them, and get to see many different styles. Before I left she made a note to contact the hospital's main lactation weekday consultant, Donna, & give her my info. She advised me to call Donna two weeks before delivery (benefit of a planned C), and tell her my due date and my background. The RN said that Donna was fantastic and would write it on her calendar and would be prepared for me before I even got there.

I felt so much better after talking to someone one-on-one about my fears and getting some positive feedback in return. It was also really nice to hear a medical professional say its okay to supplement with formula! Breast is best but don't beat yourself up over it. It was also refreshing to be real with someone about the struggles of breastfeeding, it helped me trust her so much more. I'm actually looking forward to going to this last class!

Bump Update:
35 weeks today, only 4 weeks left!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

32 Weeks & Baby Shower

Thanksgiving and Christmas totally interrupted my baby blogging so let me do a quick recap!

I had my 29 week apt before Christmas and everything was fantastic. I was measuring 33 weeks and both the nurse and I were surprised it was that much ahead. She said the doc may want to do a quick ultrasound just to see what was going on and left the room. I totally panicked thinking something was wrong and started texting friends/family. Heath didn't want to miss an ultrasound, but more importantly he was working over 4 hours away and kept asking if he needed to come home. I started to worry thinking what if something crazy happened and they sent me straight to the hospital? I didn't have a car seat, an overnight bag, the boys were at school, and I was hungry. Luckily the doctor didn't keep me waiting and she was NOT concerned. She just said that my belly size at this point is irrelevant since so many factors come into play, and can vary so much from one woman to the next. She did not want an ultrasound then as it was only 29 weeks and wouldn't change anything on their end. She ordered an ultrasound for our next apt (this Wed @ 32 weeks) only wanting to see if I have extra fluid. A big baby is okay, fluid is not. Whew. She made me feel so much better, I have an awesome doctor!

My glucose test results were fantastic, they wanted me under 140 & I had a 76 (go me!). Part of the precautions they're taking with this delivery is wanting my iron levels high, which is super hard for a pregnant woman anyways because it's typically lower in pregnancy. Normal is 12, they want mine at 14, and I was at an 11.2. Now I'm on a daily iron supplement- boo. If you've ever taken iron, I need not say more.

The next big news: Our baby has a name!!!!! Yay!!!!!!!

 

I love it (of course)! It's so much fun to think of him as Baby Luke (or "Wuke" as Easton says), or Baby Lucas. I have no idea which one I will say more often as I love both names. I'll just have to meet this handsome fella first! We decided not to introduce a family name as he's the third boy and we felt like we should have done that with the first boy if that was the route we were going to go. We just really liked the names and that was the only one we agreed on. My #1 name was Shepherd. I love that name, but Heath did not. Heath's #1 was Uriah.....um, no. So after we (both) stubbornly held out for months we finally realized we'd (both) have to give up our #1 names and go with something completely different. Luke was thisclose to a "J" name (Joshua, Josiah, Jeremiah), but we steered clear of that too. I think this baby was the hardest to decide. Heath came up with it one night and I was just like, yes, that is it! You get all the credit, babe.

 

I kept saying I'd get the baby's room together after Christmas passed. I had to get through the holidays before I could focus on the next big event, but the nesting thing totally kicked in right before Christmas and I was like- HOW could I not have gotten this done already?!?! I cried- of course- and Heath, always the voice of reason, reminded me that I purposely wanted to wait b/c I didn't want to organize twice-putting the Christmas toys & then moving them again when we prepare for room sharing. Oh yes, okay, that's right. My "big" checklist is done and although my crib bedding is still on order and not in my house, I'm trying to be okay with that!

 

• car seat/stroller- done
• crib bedding- done and on the way
• breast pump- PAID FOR 100% by Aetna- Hallelujah!!!
• newborn pictures- scheduled
• baby book- ALREADY filled out the beginning, what?!
• meal planning- 3 are frozen for future dinners as we speak (my goal is to make 2/week)

 

Am I on fire, or what?

 

Another reason I wanted to wait until after Christmas was my baby shower on January 4th! Pam throws the cutest Pinterest-worthy parties and I was so excited she wanted to throw one for me! I told her the theme for this baby's room and trusted her to make it look great- and she did!! My Aunt Jackie cohosted, and Heath and I were so thankful that Baby Luke would have a special moment to celebrate his arrival. The food was delicious, and it was so nice to spend time with family and friends, some I haven't seen in years! We are so appreciative of Pam & Jackie's efforts to make the afternoon special! 

 

Can you guess what his room will look like?

 

Love the little touches- like having our maternity pics framed!

My lovely corsage!

 

 

Isn't it beautiful?! I know I keep saying that but I loved it. I told Pam we were doing a nautical theme & painting the nursery walls a light gray, and would incorporate red/navy/whites into it and she totally made everything match at the shower so I can use the crafts again in his room- loooove!

 

My 32 week "bump" which is getting alarmingly big....

 



 

And others from the day:

 



Pam & Jackie, the family that put it all together for me

Me & Mama

 

It was such a fun day...I loved getting to celebrate this little one on the way, and getting to chat with everyone at the shower. It's going to be so fun to fold all these little things into drawers one last time!!!

 

Thank you Pam and Jackie for such a great afternoon, it will always be special to me.