dot Mom 2014

I had the best weekend going to this event, and I highly recommend it for all Moms’: younger, older, newer, more experienced- if you’re a Mom you’ve got to make it to this event. It was a packed weekend and FILLED me in a way that I truly needed. It was such a great time!

 

 

We (Pam, Ramona {Pam’s Mom}, and I) left out Friday morning after dropping Easton & Sawyer off at school, and getting our free coffee at McDonald’s. J

The event started Friday at 1 with worship, and then after a small break from 2:30-2:45, the breakout started. I really liked how they showed the weekend’s schedule. You could highlight the classes you wanted to attend, and then pick the best day/time to work around the other events. There were a total of 8 of us that went that weekend, but everyone split up when it came time to breakout, depending on what you wanted to sit in on. There were SO MANY to choose from that it was hard to decide, I wished they would have taught one more day!

At 2:45 I attended “Divine Weapons to Demolish Strongholds for Moms” by Leighann McCoy.

 

 

I could really spend a lot of space writing about how wonderful each speaker was, and sharing my notes, but I’ll pick my favorites to share to save space and time.

 There was a break from 4-4:15, and then the next breakout began. Angela Cottrell (Travis Cottrell’s wife) taught “Help! How can I be a Godly Wife and Mother?” Dinner was from 5:30-7:30 (on your own), and then Worship began again at 7:30pm, followed by a Late Night Bash at 9pm. The 8 of us all met at Cracker Barrel for dinner and as soon as my belly was full, my body was like, “yeah, you’re done now, we’re shutting you down.” I did NOT want to miss worship that night, but knew if I made it through that I’d be falling asleep standing up for the late night bash. It’s probably the one time I wished I wasn’t pregnant. Our hotel was about 15 minutes away from the venue, and I didn’t want to make our group leave if I tired early, so I just had them drop me off at the hotel after dinner and thought I’d wait for them to get back. Ha! I crashed. Like, so hard that Pam said they came back and put their hand on my back to make sure I was breathing- and I slept through it! I have to try and make myself sound a little better by mentioning TN time is an hour behind us…but I did totally fall asleep early, ha ha.

Worship began at 9:30 Saturday morning and lasted through 11. Steve and Debbie Wilson were a couple that were platform speakers to lead us into our first class. They taught the marriage seminars and honestly, I hadn’t planned on attending one that weekend as I wanted to focus more on being a Mom. Y’all. That couple brought it. I think the whole auditorium was moved to tears as they focused (lovingly) on some of the pitfalls we get can fall into as wives. Temper, Irritability, Selfishness. I was more than convicted, that was one of those moments where you know God was there, and you can’t describe that feeling to people that weren’t in the room. God worked, and it was amazing. They went well over the end time of 11am.

“Expectations- sabotage a lot of good.

1.      We don’t talk about them- unspoken expectations will always lead to discouragement.

2.      Unmet expectations will always lead to disappointment. Don’t spend years dwelling on what your husband is not. If your husband can’t win, eventually, he will quit trying. What about your children? Do they get a win too? Are you constantly raising the bar on your family, to the point that you can’t be pleased?

3.      Unrealistic expectations will lead to defeat. Are you standing in the way of what a spiritual leader looks like for your husband?

Irritability

Have a temper, Mom’s? Somewhere as a little girl, you learned that fit-throwing worked for you. It got you what you want. Your brain says, “this works.” Temper people- it’s time to grow up. You’re just being selfish now and want to control the environment. You don’t want to take responsibility for your own actions. If you profess to be a Jesus person, He’s tired of your behavior too. It’s enough.

You yelled at _______ (insert child’s name) again. Can your child please his Mama?

Our irritability is pushing our children away from God. Don’t ever underestimate the power of your words. Sarcasm is acid to a child. You can’t show anyone else God’s love if you don’t know it for yourself. Until you grasp this, you can’t be filled to the measure of God.”

They led an altar “stand” at the end, and I don’t know a woman who was left sitting, dry-eyed. It was just amazing. Somehow everyone collected themselves and got ready for the first break-out session. You know how you just know God’s there? That morning set me up for what I needed to receive the rest of the seminars.

From 11:15-12:30 was the first breakout of the day, but like I said it was way later than 11:15. I chose “Wild Things: The Art of Nurturing Boys” by David Thomas. He broke down development into 3 age groups: 0-4, 5-8, 9-12, and followed the outline, “He is….” and “He needs….” for each age.

 

 

 

Again, SUPER good, I would have spent the whole afternoon in that class, learning more about my little men. It made me appreciate them more, made me more excited to go home and try these new techniques. I was feeling so full and refreshed, and again, it’s something I would want other Mom’s to feel too. Being a Mommy is tiring.

Lunch was from 12:30-1:30 (Panera!), and the next breakout session began at 1:30. This time I chose “Corrective & Preventative Discipline” by Karen Alexander-Doyle. She’s a grandmother now and as soon as you heard her soft voice begin, you just wanted to be in her family. You wanted that kind of guidance around to help you raise your children. The kind of woman who seemed like patience was this never-ending thing she could provide, someone you could really enjoy talking to and learning from. I filled up pages from her, but these are my favorite highlights:

“Punishment- focuses on the past. The purpose is to get even with your child. The emotion usually felt is anger.

Discipline- focuses on the future. “I want you to become a man of God.” The purpose is growth. The emotion usually felt is love.

Preventative and corrective discipline go hand in hand. Preventative starts with your walk, Mom. God picked YOU for the children you have. You can do this. Don’t be defeated; it’s not too late to begin again. God is merciful.”

 

 

I couldn’t imagine the weekend getting much better, and we had a small break from 2:45-3, and then Worship began again. The Cartee’s led worship all weekend, and I’ve always said every day should begin with worship in an arena. They did a great job of leading worship with songs we knew, and sharing new ones they wrote with us.

 

 

Angie Smith, an author and hilarious woman, concluded the event for the weekend. She cracked us up with her stories and then brought on more waterworks as she talked about control. How we, as women, sometimes struggle with control in our household. She gave a humorous example of how her husband took her twin girls to Build-a-Bear for an afternoon, and on the outside she was like, “Bye! Have a great time!”, and on the inside she was thinking, “Don’t be out past their naps, or get anything Hello Kitty.” Can we not all relate? I could! She started with the example of Moses’s mother, how she literally had to let her hands off that basket, and give that control over to God. She asked, “How often do we grip our children with one hand, but then tell them ‘trust God, He’s got this’? Why would our children need a Savior when they’ve got Mom doing it for them?” Ouch, ouch, ouch. Then- I think this will be what I write down everywhere to remind myself- she said, “Our job as mothers is not to build up our children’s faith, it’s to build up our own, and know they are watching. We get to love Him enough that they want to love Him too. Show them a faith that leaves them no other option but to know that He’s real.”

I don’t really know if I could have cried more in one weekend?! Good tears too- not all guilty ones, just being filled with the Word.

I really wished that I had been able to sit in on every class, and was THRILLED when they were selling the audio CD of every seminar held that weekend- thank you!!! Now I can go back and listen to the ones I missed, yay!

It was such a fun girl’s weekend. I’m so thankful to all the husbands that were willing to stay home with the kids, and for my Dad who was willing to pick up Easton from school, and Cory from his school, just so this could happen. Thank you honey for keeping our boys busy, taking them to football games & a festival. Thanks to Pam for letting me invite myself and to her family for welcoming me in their group for the weekend!